I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
