Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
