i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
