at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
