But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
