"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
