Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
