It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize