Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
