I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
