Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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