I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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