You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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