I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
