please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
