I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
