But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
