Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
