For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
