yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Randomize
