i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
