I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
