"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
