I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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