my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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