I smell stomach acid.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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