If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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