hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
