We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
