Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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