were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
