Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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