Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
