Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I'm having to shit out rocks
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