I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
