Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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