I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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