HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
