were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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