its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
