Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Randomize
