i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
