Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Randomize
