i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
