hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Randomize
