i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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