I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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