and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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