There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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