Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize
